Finally I feel normal (only by way of mess) but yeah!

so it’s almost sunrise and in AZ at this time of year it’s close to 5:30am.  But if you have any type of sleeping disorder you won’t find it odd that I’m out and about right now.

    So my nuvigal is what I take for fatigue and what I’ve been diagnosed with as OSA(obstructive sleep apnea) a fairly mild form of sleep apnea.  When I took the over night sleep study, I of course begged for a take home test and was able to get one. I  picked up the equipment in the afternoon on a Tuesday and got a little instructions from the front desk and a pamphlet for doing it at home.  So later that night when I was very close to falling asleep which was maybe 7:30 pm.. And this was late for me, but I was instructed that I needed to keep the device on my body for at least 8 hours. At this point in time my pattern of sleep was to eat my largest meal as late as possible and try to space out my last remaining clonapin so I could crawl into bed before I fell asleep.

   Sounds strange but for the last 3 years I have been very comfortable sleeping outside… And at first I would fall asleep in a camping chair in my backyard.  But when summer came so did allot of my worst things… Cockroaches! I Hate  the little bastards.. And by hate I mean despise and fear more than any other small insect. I really don’t know how I have been living in AZ my whole life since roaches are a seasonal habitat of the dessert.

  But back to the sleep study.. I found it  to have less bugs in the front yard on a metal glider. So I have gone from just a few hours of sleep out side, to the entire night out side, and then back to my bed when I would get extremely sore in my back and neck. Which is a story in itself as to dealing with neck pain.  

    So I had eaten and not taken any clonapin but was still getting very tired.. So I quickly assembled my test outfit with was a strap across my chest that was positioned right under my breasts.  Not very comfortable but it also had the main part of the device attached to it.. The strap was a 2″ tall velcro strap and it has a 4×4 black machine that when I hooked up the link to my chest with a sticker and an oxygen tube in my nose, I turned the machine on and it popped up with my oxygen saturation, my pulse and my heart rate. 

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What do you do when pharmacy dictates my life..

I’m sitting in the back of my pharmacy and it’s dark and quiet because it’s Sunday morning and the clinic is closed so I have a quiet spot to sit down and talk to you about the last few days.          I’ve missed quite a bit of posting and I am frustrated with myself for this, I have tried to get the energy to make a post that is helpful and positive because having chronic disease is something that I have found makes it hard to find very much positive in my daily life. So just a lot of anxiety and depression and ups and downs from what I found out later was a serotonin saturation that was caused by my cymbalta and my allergy medications. Living in AZ my whole life I am just now beginning to develop seasonal allergies that increase to the point of congestion and eye irritation and skin itching, nasal congestion and the whole bunch of shit that differs from a normal spring day to a windy day. So I have been trying different types of allergy medicine and I found mucinex to be pretty good at working on the congestion.  So I am going to post a video of the ridiculous mess of symptoms and hopefully I can start to feel a little bit more balanced. Not to mention today is mothers day and I haven’t talked to my son in over a week.  But I will post more about what I have found to get myself through the last week of running out of medication and going to the sphycologist and all the stressful shit that I have been having to deal with.  And I know you have just as much to deal with in your life so please let me know your thoughts on coping with withdrawal from meds or having meds clash and make you feel crazy..  I would love to hear some feedback.  Have a great day and take time to tell your mom how much she means to you… Even if it’s a step mom or if you are not in a great place with your mom.. Or if your mom has passed away, maybe you have a fantastic person who you are close to and look up to in the absence of a mother. Anyways I do hope you can relate or laugh at my ridiculous behavior. Love Sarah